Caterer – 30 Minutes for a Jewish Wedding Ceremony

by Darma


I am so confused. Am I paying the Wedding location Caterer and I am their customer? Then why is the caterer telling me how much time I have for a wedding ceremony? I do not want a rush rush Jewish wedding ceremony. Isn’t the wedding and the marriage the most important part of my wedding day? On top of that, they are going to charge me extra if I run 15 minutes over time. What!

Can you guide me with this non-enjoyable discovery with my Caterer?

Thank you,

Dear Darma,

You asked a good question. I have had a few couples falling into this situation that affected their Jewish wedding ceremony to be rushed. From my viewpoint, it was not comfortable!

Bottom line, the catering side is a business. They have guests to feed, employees to serve and pay, but that is really not your concern. You hired them to take care of all that.

Then you have Mr. wonderful caterer whom puts the customer relationship first seeing that is what makes a good business. Those are good memories of planning a special wedding ceremony/reception.

Yes, the pre-ceremony Ketubah signing along with your Marriage License; the Jewish wedding ceremony under the Chuppah is the central focus of the whole entire wedding day. Take away all the beautiful details, and it is the customs, the traditions, and most importantly, it is the marriage.

Weddings are a multi-million dollar business and it can fog up what is important.

Including the processional to the Chuppah, the ceremony under the Chuppah, 30 minutes for a traditional Jewish wedding ceremony is impossible! To have a comfortable non-rushed Chuppah ceremony, 45 minutes is much more workable.

Note: A Jewish wedding ceremony is not religious. It is based on traditions and customs. There are specific traditions and customs that make up this life cycle beautiful ceremony of marriage.

You also need 15-20 minutes for the pre-ceremony to sign the Ketubah and Marriage License and include the other beautiful traditions in that pre-ceremony.

When you did not sign anything, always ask questions and when you do sign a contract, put it in writing. This is your safety net if that catering representative will not be there on your wedding day.

If you signed a contract, arrange a meeting in person and talk all the details out. You are the customer and some caterers lose sight of that. A signed contract should not define as submission of power.

Enjoy the planning of your wedding day, don’t lose sight on what is important.

Thank you for asking.

Rabbi Andrea

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